


The Great Divide  Chapter #30 The Dark of You

by Antigravity_Carnivore



Series: The Great Divide [30]
Category: Breaking Benjamin (Band), Project Vela (Band), STARSET (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Dark, Alternate Universe - Future, Alternate Universe - Rock Band, Alternate Universe - Science Fiction, Angst, Dark, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Future Fic, Gay, Inspired by Music, M/M, Male Homosexuality, Music, Musicians, Science Fiction, Science Fiction & Fantasy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-22
Updated: 2018-06-22
Packaged: 2019-05-26 17:40:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 23,199
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15005993
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Antigravity_Carnivore/pseuds/Antigravity_Carnivore
Summary: The story draws to it's multi part epic conclusion





	The Great Divide  Chapter #30 The Dark of You

-The Great Divide Special Chapter #5 (Final) -The Dark of You- part 1-

Lizzie backed up against the computer console, her small feet stepping silently one at a time on the concrete floor, leading her back until she bumped into the hard metal panel and had to stop; there was nowhere else to go. Her hands gripped the metal so hard that her knuckles turned white. Judging from the description that Thomas had given her from his dream, she knew that this woman standing in front of her was Benjamin’s wife, and mother of the bastard that raped her. In the dim red emergency light glow, Lizzie could see that Rhiannon was dressed in the standard issue FEC uniform, black boots, pants and a flight jacket with the logo emblazoned across both of the arms. Her long blond hair was pulled back into a loose braid that cascaded over her shoulder, accentuating her deep pale eyes. “How…can you be…here…why are you here?” Lizzie asked, feeling utterly terrified.

Rhiannon smiled, parting her bright pink lips. “Well you see, your friend Brock, he has been the one preventing me from being able to move freely and influence others very much. However, these last few days he’s been foolishly expending the energy that’s keeping me trapped and therefore, as he becomes weaker, I get stronger.” Reaching out, Rhiannon placed her hands on the high backed chair where Brock had been sitting moments earlier. She closed her eyes and leaned her head back slightly. “He’s very weak now. I can only barely feel his presence. He’s very close to fading away; he wasted so much of himself here with you. What a pity. I thought for sure that he would put up more of a fight against me, but no, he chose to use that power to warn you all, and in doing so, he threw what little life he had left away. I do admire him for trying, but in the end, he’s just a fool like the rest of you. So I am here, because he is not. Simple as that.”

Feeling the anger rising inside of her Lizzie shouted, “What do you want from me? You already took one of my sons, I have nothing more that you could possibly want!”

Opening her eyes, Rhiannon walked across the small room and started to approach Lizzie, as she drew near, Lizzie pushed herself away from the control panel and skidded across the room to the opposite side, trying to put as much distance between them as possible. She knew that the room was locked and was fearful that she would falter with her clumsy fingers again and not be able to enter the code in time before Rhiannon could reach her. She cowered in the corner of the room, looking around for something to use as a weapon. Rhiannon let out a laugh. “Wow, you are quite the startled thing aren’t you? Before we move on, I think that we need to get something straight, understand little rabbit? I didn’t take your child, BENJAMIN did. YOU handed him over to Ben willingly, and HIS arms were the ones that carried him away. Not mine. So do be careful who you are placing blame on. I will admit that on several occasions, when he laid his head down at night, my lips brushed over his ear and made him remember things from his past which he conveniently forgot about…his friends, his family, his wife… his…child which may have led to his melancholy, but he has always been the one to make his own choices and choose which path he takes. He chose his own life, just as he chose to take that child away from you. I didn’t tell him to take your child, nor did I instruct him in any way to assist me. Benjamin betraying you is not my concern, and even though it’s true I do want the child for my own purposes, I never commanded him to take it. My husband is a great threat to everyone, not just you and your family, Lizzie Bell but to me as well. What was done, was done with Ben’s own will.”

Fighting back the paralyzing fear that she was feeling, Lizzie was only paying half attention to the woman’s words. She was a few feet away from the door, with her thoughts focused on escape. Without any sort of protection, Lizzie knew that her only choice now was to make a run for it, if she could just get past that lock on the door. Brock had her lock it to make sure that no one could get in to disturb them while they were trying to contact the others, but he had no idea that the danger would come from inside. Inching towards the door, Lizzie glared at Rhiannon. “I don’t believe you. Benjamin would never make a choice to hurt any of us. Whatever happened to him is your fault! Everything was okay until you showed up. We were happy!” Lizzie fumed; she could feel the anger rising rapidly inside of her. She had just met this woman and hated her already.

“Wrong.” Casually making her way around the chair which Brock had been sitting on only moments earlier, Rhiannon sat down, and crossed her legs. “Benjamin… the man that you all so blindly put your faith and trust in, my husband… is not the man that you all make him out to be. He’s not some unbreakable mountain of strength that can stand up to insurmountable odds and come out victorious. He’s just a ordinary man who suffers and feels pain like the rest of us. He made the choice to leave you here alone to pursue Selene, knowing that she was possibly dead, putting you and your children in danger. Why do you think he did that? Running out on the living to save the dead? It doesn’t make any sense. Then he murdered Aaron in cold blood, and left his body to rot out there, discarded like trash for the animals to pick at. Absolutely no respect at all. Then he let the power take over him and become the Shepherd of the Damned, stealing your child and taking so many innocent lives in the process. These are not the actions of a happy man, Lizzie. Stop trying to live in this made up fantasy world that you love so much and face reality. Benjamin isn’t the hero of this story.”

Trying to move without being detected, Lizzie found herself within arm’s length of the electronic keypad that would release the lock. All she had to do was stretch out and hit the buttons. She repeated the code over and over in her head and tried to stop her fingers from shaking, but she started listening, drawn into Rhiannon’s cool tone, her voice being hard to ignore. “I know all this already.” Lizzie said quietly. “If you’re trying to scare me, it’s not working. I am not frightened of you. You are nothing more than a ghost.”

Rhiannon stretched her arms out on the sides of the chair and then suddenly withdrew her hand. She turned her wrist around to look at her fingertips and noticed that there was a spot of fresh blood there which had been picked up from where it had seeped into the chair. It was Brock’s blood. Lizzie watched in disgust as Rhiannon brought her finger up to her lips and licked it off. “I am not the one you should be scared of, rabbit. It’s Benjamin. He’s the one that is going to bring this whole world to an end now. He’s already claimed the soul of Aaron, and all those soldiers who were trying to defend you, their blood is on his hands and their life essence surges through him now, filling his blood with immense strength and power beyond your wildest dreams.” Sitting back in the chair, Rhiannon once again closed her eyes, and Lizzie took the opportunity to creep over to the door. “All he had to do was walk across the hall and snap your little neck like a twig, but he didn’t… he let you live. Everything he does is planned out and precise, because he’s incredibly smart and clever. You don’t know why he let you live, do you? Well, I can assure you that it’s not because of this ‘family’ thing you think that you have going on. I am the only family that he will ever truly accept. Little Benjamin and I, we were meant to be together. No, there’s something else behind it, think about it. Did it feel like the moment when Burnley stared you down at the end of the corridor when you and Thomas were trying to escape? Those cold, heartless eyes locked right on to you, looking through you, making you feel like your skin was crawling? Did you get the sense that if you made the wrong move, or said the wrong word, he’d lash out and take even more lives? Did you see the beast that was buried inside of him snarl at you? That’s what he’s become now. There is no hope for him.” Rhiannon stopped and shrugged. “I don’t know why he spared you, and I don’t care either. You’re safe, for the moment, but he is going to take yet another soul, very soon, he can’t stop himself, it’s in his blood now, I can feel it. Something is driving him to the point of madness. Not only is he inflicting pain on the living, but the dead as well.”

Her fingers poised over the keys, her heart feeling like it was being constricted, Lizzie hesitated. She stopped entering the code to unlock the door and had taken interest in what Rhiannon was saying. “…the dead?”

Rhiannon started speaking softly, as if she was speaking to a small child. “Mmm hmm. The woman tried to warn him, she could feel the poison that was in his body slowly eating away at him for months, as well as the dormant power of the Shepherd, lurking just beneath the surface and false guise of a mortal man. He had been through so much the last year, fighting and resisting the urge to release the caged beast inside, but always managed to keep it at bay. Now, exhausted from sleepless nights, and his body physically weakened by the strange poison flowing though him that was corroding his insides, she begged him to hold on for just a bit longer, to find something to believe in so that he wasn’t carried away and lost forever. It was no use, he had already made his choice, and it was at that moment when she turned away from him and walked away. Her spirit unable to look at the atrocity that he had become. She had lost a son before, and seeing this man who she had come to know and love as her own flesh let the darkness overtake him was too much. She turned away from him. Convinced that he was beyond redemption, she was ready to fade away, knowing that she could never stop him. That was supposed to be the end of her story, but when he brought the child to Dawn, she once again intervened and appeared before him. She wasn’t going to let him take another innocent life. Sadly, even though she fought with all she had, he defeated her, it wasn’t much of a fight anyway… not with Benjamin having the strength of a god. At the end of her existence, when she was about to vanish into the nothing, he reached out and plucked her from the void. She begged for release, screamed to be set free, but he wouldn’t let her have it, she got in his way, and he would never let her have that satisfaction now. So instead he took her soul and twisted it into something dark and vile, making her a guard dog to stand in watch at the gates of Dawn. Now the woman who once wanted nothing but peace and serenity on Prox brings vengeance and pain. Her redemption for taking his child will never come, she is doomed forever now to be his slave, and never rest until he is defeated. She has become the unholy incarnation of Death itself. Good thing you didn’t defy him, rabbit, or this fate may have befallen you as well.”

The keypad just underneath her fingertips, Lizzie stood motionless. The only sound in the room was that of her own breath rattling in her lungs. “Who is she? Tell me please. I need to know.”

Rhiannon opened her eyes. “You know who it is.”

“Selene.” Lizzie’s hand fell away from the buttons as Rhiannon slipped out of the chair and walked around to meet her at the door. “Benjamin wouldn’t do that to her, she’s….”

Leaning forward, Rhiannon sneered at Lizzie. “What? Family? You know damn well that means nothing now. It’s just a word, stop trying to turn it into something it’s not. He’s using her just as he is using the rest of us.” Resting her hand against the electronic lock, she sent a crackle of energy into the device, and suddenly it exploded with a loud boom and the room was filled with an acrid black smoke. Rhiannon had destroyed the lock, and now Lizzie was trapped in the room with her, there was no escape. Reaching out, she picked up a strand of Lizzie’s hair that had fallen down around her face and twirled it around her fingers. “You thought that this was all behind you, that the FEC had been brought down and that you and your family could go on living out the rest of your lives, happily ever after here on Prox. I wish that you could have found what you were seeking, rabbit, but love is never fair, and we all must pay our dues as we go along, it’s just part of living.”

Lizzie stepped back, her eyes tearing up with the smoke from the smoldering wiring of the lock melting in the wall. Her thoughts went to Thomas, and the look in his eyes when she said goodbye to him a day earlier. He didn’t want to leave her alone, but he had faith in her that should stay strong, and if the time came, that she would defend the Messengers with the last breath of her life. It this was knowledge that Lizzie used as her strength now, and stood defiantly in front of Rhiannon with. “I don’t know what you want from me, but I won’t let you hurt anyone else here. I will fight you with all that I have to protect these people. So just tell me what you want and we can get this over with.”

“What I want Lizzie right now is for you to sit down and listen to me. Nothing more.” Rhiannon noticed her hesitation and gestured toward the chair. “Please.”

Crossing her arms in front of her chest, Lizzie shook her head. “No. I am find standing.”

Rhiannon shrugged. “Have it your way then, it matters little to me.” Taking a few steps, she came to stand across from Lizzie, but left her enough space not to feel cornered and took a deep breath. “Let me start from the beginning. I love my husband, very much. When he died, I was devastated, and then shortly after when my son was taken, my world was shattered. I knew that Benjamin was gone, but I had hope that perhaps I could find my son. That hope is what kept me alive. I didn’t care if others thought I was a madwoman for going out there and looking for him, it was something I had to do and no one was going to stop me. I thought that maybe if I found my son, part of me would begin to heal…Then there was the accident on the bridge.” Rhiannon sighed deeply and a dark shadow slipped over her face. “I don’t remember much of it, only that I thought I saw my son and went to him. I never saw the car that hit me, only the shocked look of the driver’s eyes as the impact happened, then darkness. It was in this darkness that I remained for what felt like an eternity, the only thing that was keeping me sane was the memories of a life that I thought was possibly over. Every day I played them out in my head over and over, sunny days on the beach, or evenings at home with popcorn, and Ben playing music for us, these are what kept me alive. I wrapped myself in them and used them as what I needed to keep the darkness away. I didn’t know what was going on in the world; I had no idea that the FEC was destroying the Earth and that my body was being transported to Prox for ‘safe keeping’. To me it was the endless darkness and nothing more. When they put that visor on me, that’s when things started to change. I began to see things, things that I didn’t quite understand and I nearly went insane…I could have lost myself to that insanity, night after night, but then…I saw them, I saw Benjamin and my son, and I felt them here, on Prox. They weren’t here before, I knew that for a fact and I didn’t care how they got here, I just knew that I had to find a way to get to them. So I started to use the power of the visor to work for me. It was hard at first, I was only able to see flashes of things, fragments of what was going on, but after some time, I was able to influence dreams, alter reality and so much more.”

Looking down at her hand, Lizzie ran her thumb over the spot where her wedding ring had been. She missed Thomas, and her boys, and desperately wanted this all to be over. “So you saw Burnley then? You know what kind of monster he turned out to be?”

Scowling, Rhiannon shot her a disdainful look. “I saw enough to know that he was a victim, just like the rest of us, hardly the monster you all are making him out to be. He is a product of the FEC; one that deserves another chance at life, which is why I started down the path of vengeance. You’re a mother, you can understand why I want him back…why I am so desperate to give him another chance at life, he has the potential to be good, if given the opportunity.”

“Not by taking the life of my child!” Lizzie’s voice carried loudly throughout the small room, booming it out over the rolling claps of thunder. “He’s only a baby, and hasn’t had a chance yet to have a life, Burnley had his and wasted it, and he needs to stay dead! You said that you love your husband, and yet you manipulated him to come here and take baby Ben away from me so that you can have him to murder and bring your own child back. That’s not right, Rhiannon. I don’t care what you say about Ben choosing his own path, you ARE USING Benjamin to do your dirty work, and it sickens me to think about the little respect you have for others. You’re no better than Burnley was. I don’t think that the FEC messed him up, I think that it’s your in blood to be this wicked, and you’ve passed it right along to your son. The only good that could have ever been in him was from his father, obviously not you.”

At that moment, a bolt of lightning struck outside the base, crashing down with a insane fury and striking something nearby. The floor under them shook from the impact and Rhiannon grabbed hold of the chair that she had been leaning against and threw it towards Lizzie, who managed to duck out of the way at the last possible moment to avoid being hit. “You’re not listening to me! Damn it, why are you so daft? It’s not me! It’s Benjamin. He’s the one that took your child, not me. He’s become the Shepherd of the Damned, but it’s much worse than that, I am sure that you could feel it when you were near him, he’s powerful beyond words now and I don’t know why. I can’t feel him anymore, or whisper thoughts to him, everything is hazy and dark. All I can feel is that horrible, terrible power that’s coming from inside. He’s insane with rage and a insatiable hunger clawing away at him. I saw what he did to Selene, and then nothing… he disappeared when he entered Dawn. Fuck! Lizzie, why won’t you listen to me? Benjamin needs to be stopped! I am asking for your help here, because I am afraid that he’s coming for me next.”

Lizzie couldn’t help but to smirk. “So let him. At least then I know that your plan to kill my son won’t go through.”

Pushing the fallen chair out of her way, Rhiannon shot across the room towards Lizzie and stood in front of her, uncomfortably close. “Do you honestly think that he will stop at killing me? Something is wrong with him, and he’s destroying everything that he loves. When I figured out how to use the visor and open rifts in reality, I brought two of his friends here, hoping that I could use them in case something like this happened. But I now know that Benjamin turned on me, and now I can see that was a useless gesture. Something is driving him to kill, and I don’t know what it is or how to stop him, all I know is that I am next.”

A fleeting memory popped into Lizzie’s head, Benjamin smiling as he held her child in his arms. His hands were covered in blood and his lips twisted into a vicious grin. Gazing wickedly at her, all she could concentrate on was the eerie amber color of his eyes that reflected brightly in the dull light, the same color of her son and his father. “Oh my God.” She whispered. “It’s the Eden drug. It has to be. It’s been in his system all this time. Back at the FEC base, when we escaped he came into contact with it but he refused to tell us how. It didn’t seem to affect him much back then, but it must have been slowly building up inside of him over a year.” Looking up at Rhiannon, Lizzie could now see fear in the woman’s eyes. “That is what is pushing him to kill, just like Burnley.”

“Dawn is lost now, along with everyone in it. He’s slaughtered everyone there, including innocent children and families. I fear that after he kills me, your friends will fall too. I can’t say for certain whether or not he will harm the child, but if he does…” Rhiannon stopped and walked away lost in thought.

There was a light tapping sound on the door and Lizzie could just make out the sound of a familiar voice outside in the hall. It was Scott calling for her. She went to Rhiannon and grabbed her shoulder and tried to turn her around, but she stepped out of the way. Not wanting to be shoved aside, Lizzie turned the tables and got in front of the blond woman, her face serious as ever. “What? What will happen if Benjamin harms my son Rhiannon?” The pounding on the door started to grow louder and louder. “Fucking tell me right now!”

Tilting her head to the side, Rhiannon gave her a crooked smile. “Do you remember the sickness that overcame you while you were still pregnant? No one could quite figure out what it was; only that it was one of your own children causing it, and you’d have to destroy it if you wanted the other to survive?”

“Of course I do. It was one of the worst moments in my life.” Lowering her head, Lizzie let her hair drop down and cover her face. “I knew I could never let that happen. I would gladly give my life for my child, for either of them. I spent so many hours at Dawn, crying in frustration because I didn’t know what to do. I felt like I was failing at being a mother. Thomas was at my side constantly, seeing me through it all, telling me to not give up, to keep fighting…and that’s exactly what I did. I remember the feeling of relief when Aaron came to us and told us that they found out the cause of the sickness, and that my life, as well as my child’s could be saved.” Lizzie looked up, just as a flash of light fell across Rhiannon’s face. “You did something, didn’t you?”

“Not me alone, I had help from Aaron and a few others.”

Lizzie grabbed the front of Rhiannon’s flight jacket and began to shake her back and forth violently. “What did you do? What did you do?”

Laughing, Rhiannon put her icy cold hands over Lizzie’s wrists and squeezed with an inhuman strength. Feeling her skin start to become numb, Lizzie instantly let go. “I did what any other mother would do! I saved my child!” Turning on her heel, Rhiannon walked across the room over to the door, where more voices could be heard from outside in the hall. She lightly rested her hand on the steel frame and took a deep breath. “I had collected Burnley’s soul after he died, I refused to just let him slip away. He’s a very defiant child, and fought me every step of the way. I tried to keep it contained, and subdued but there was something that refused to let him sit still and accept his fate. No matter how I tried to punish him with hallucinations of the most horrifying nature, or make him convince he was safe, he refused to believe, so I had to take steps to make sure he wouldn’t ever escape me.” Rhiannon looked to Lizzie with an expressionless face. “It wasn’t supposed to happen until after he was born, because there might have been complications, but it was a risk I was willing to take. So without you knowing, I transferred Burnley’s soul into that of your child while it was still in the womb growing. That ‘sickness’ that you were feeling was that of his spirit taking over the life inside of you. It took some time to be acclimated, but once it was, I knew that everything was going to be okay. He was safe and sound tucked away in the last place anyone would look for him.”

The breath suddenly left Lizzie’s lungs, and she felt her knees weaken and she slunk down the wall, with her arms wrapped around her stomach. “You mean…Burnley… was here all this time.” She felt sick and disgusted, her mind reeling with the knowledge that she had a psychopathic murder growing inside of her for months.

“In a manner of speaking... The child he foolishly fathered which grew inside of you is still yours, and still remains intact with a life and spirit of its own. It’s quite strong actually. Burnley is merely tucked away ‘sleeping’. Your baby, if left to grow up would be perfectly fine, and have a normal life, maybe a few bad dreams here and there, however, if that child were to die then Burnley’s spirit would be free to take over that vessel and be reborn. Have you ever wondered why he took so well to Benjamin and not anyone else? There’s your answer. Blood knows its own, in more ways than one. I am truly sorry that it happened this way, but I simply couldn’t contain Burnley’s spirit for much longer, he’s so strong. Ben is going to kill me, without a doubt, but there’s also the chance that he might go after your son out of a murderous rage, I can’t tell...no one really can…but your friends are there. That is, if Selene hasn’t already taken care of them. They will try and stop him from hurting the child, and if that happens then I can assure you that Benjamin will go through each and every one, killing them each in turn, including your husband, Thomas. He won’t stop until he gets to that child. He’s taking souls, fueled by the Eden drug.”

“Benjamin wouldn’t hurt him, he loves that child! You’re making all of this up just to try and mess with me! Well, I don’t believe you! I will never listen to what you are saying.” Lizzie shot back, wiping the tears from her eyes. She was aware that Scott and the others were trying to get the door to the room open now; she could hear them outside, still calling and yelling for her. They were so close, and yet so far away.

Rhiannon came to kneel next to Lizzie. “You said it yourself, the moment that Ben walked out the broken window, covered in the blood of the men that he had murdered. ‘That’s not the real Benjamin’ you said, and that’s the truth Lizzie. He’s become more than the Shepherd of the Damned now, he’s become a God.” Looking over Rhiannon’s shoulder, Lizzie saw the large steel doors start to give away. “Listen to me, I know that my time is almost at an end now, I could have spent my last remaining moments trying to stop him, but I knew that would be useless. I decided to warn you so that you and your friends have a chance at stopping him. I… I am sorry about Brock, but you have to understand that he wouldn’t listen to reason either. His mind is clouded when it comes to Burnley and he fails to see the bigger picture here. This isn’t about me, and it’s not about you. It’s about saving Prox.” Her eyes fell right on Lizzie. “…and the future.”

Before Lizzie could respond to her the door behind them suddenly burst open, sending a cloud of dust and debris into the air. It got into her lungs and eyes, making her choke. She raised her arms up to shield her face, closing them for a moment, then heard Scott’s voice somewhere in the room. “Lizzie? Lizzie? Hey are you alright?” As she opened her eyes, she saw him standing over her with a small squad of men, looking worried. At that moment, the power was restored to the base and all the electronic equipment came back online, filling the room with loud beeps.

“Where is she?” Lizzie said in a panic, frantically looking around. “Where is Rhiannon?”

Scott glanced at her confused. “Huh? What? There’s no one here but me and my men.” He drew his weapon and searched through the room. “Was there someone here? Did they hurt you? Wait, where did Brock go?”

Pulling herself up to her feet, Lizzie immediately shoved Scott out of the way and stood the chair back up, wheeling it back over to the control panel, and flopping down on it, positioning herself in front of the monitors. “We need to get the system back up as soon as possible. It is important that we get a message out to Thomas and Dustin, they are in great danger.” Typing on the keyboard, she tried to enter the same lines of codes that she had seen Brock do earlier, but her fingers wouldn’t move fast enough, it was eating up valuable minutes of time that they didn’t have.

“Lizzie, even if we got the entire system running, the satellites on the roof have been damaged by the storm. We can’t send any signals out without them being repaired first and it’s too dangerous to send anyone out there now. We can’t do anything until the storm passes. I am sorry.” Scott frowned and looked down at Lizzie whose eyes were set and fixed on the monitors which displayed nothing but static electronic snow. She was searching for a signal of some sort that would give her confirmation that her friends were still alive. 

“If you don’t send someone up there right now, then I will go.” She spun around on the chair and looked to Scott. “This is serious and unless you can find a way to get me to Dawn right now, there’s no other option. I need to get in touch with Thomas as soon as possible. I’ll climb onto the roof and fix the fucking thing if none of your men will. I don’t care about the risk at this point. Do you understand me? Do I have to make this an order?” 

Lizzie shot him a warning glance, and Scott knew that it was pointless to argue with her. Crestfallen, he took a step away from the control panel and dropped his gaze down to the floor. “Ugh sure okay, whatever you say, I don’t want to put any of my men in danger, so I’ll do it. I don’t mind.” Reaching in front of her, he picked up a small radio and handed her the mate. “Keep this set on the current frequency and I’ll radio for you the second I get it done so you can make the transmission and get your message out.”

Taking the radio out of his hand, Lizzie didn’t take her eyes off the screen in front of her. “Fine. Do whatever it is you have to, just make it quick.”

Scott sighed and turned around to leave, stepping past all the rubble from the collapsed doors with great care. He motioned for his men to remain and slowly walked over to the door. “Oh Lizzie, by the way, Tristan is fine. I left him sleeping in the nursery with several guards and a nurse. They are good people and I instructed them to let me know if they see or hear anything suspicious at all. He will be safe.” Scott stopped for a moment, waiting for some bit of acknowledgment, but receiving none. She wasn’t paying any attention to him. “He took a bottle about 20 minutes ago and went right out, he’s doing well, considering everything that’s going on and the fact that his brother is missing. I…I…just want you to know that I am here for you, if you need anything. I mean, I know that you have Thomas and all, but if you need someone to talk to that’s here now, to get things off your chest, I am here for you. I want to help you.”

“Okay.” Resting her elbows on the console, Lizzie leaned in, transfixed.

Reaching a hand into his pocket, Scott withdrew an item and brought it back over to her. With great care, he placed Lizzie’s wedding ring on the flat surface of the console in front of her. “I almost forgot, this was left back in the greenhouse. I didn’t want it to get lost during clean up, so I kept it safe for you.” Sighing, Scott glanced around the room to his men, who gave him a sympathetic look in return. “You’re welcome.” He said to no one in particular and headed out.

As the storm raged on and thick dense dark clouds filled the night sky outside the Dawn base, the temperature began to drop, and I found myself shivering uncontrollably. Keith, Thomas and I now stood face to face with Selene Bell, transformed into the unholy incarnation of Death itself. Standing in front of us, her long black hooded cloak flowing out behind her in dramatic fashion, she stood guard at the gates which led into the base, blocking our way to our destination. Behind her, I could just make out a twisting path, grown over with trees and vegetation that concealed a large amount of birds watching us. I couldn’t help but to stare at them, into their cold black eyes in wonder. They were crows, the scavengers of the animal kingdom, and they were waiting for their next meal. There was an ominous feeling in the air now, which filled me with a sense of dread. I had feeling that something bad was about to happen. Thomas stood on the right side of me, looking pale and incredibly tired. I looked over at him, and saw that he kept staring forward, at Selene, his mother. “Hey, Thomas are you okay?”

“Dustin, something’s not right here.” He said quietly.

“Of course not!” Keith chimed in from behind us. “I shot her several times with the pistol set on the highest, most powerful setting. Each of the blasts hit her, and at this range, there shouldn’t be anything left but she’s still standing there unphased…and where the hell did she get that weapon from? It looked like she formed it out of the electricity in the air. This is seriously fucked up man, I’ve never seen anything like it.”

My eyes went to the scythe that she still had clutched in her hand. The silver metal shone brightly with every flash of lightning that illuminated the area, and it crackled with a brilliant purple energy which flowed like water up and down the black lacquer pole. Selene’s back was arched slightly and several of the curls of her hair spilled out from her hood and down around the front of her face, partially obscuring it. The crows perched in the trees behind her watched and waited. They knew that their time was near. All they had to do was wait. It was a terrifying sight. “We need to figure out what is going on here before we make a move.” I looked directly at Keith. “That means no flying off the handle and taking matters into your own hands again. Selene is my friend and Thomas’s mother. If something has happened to her then we need to help her, not just shoot first and ask questions later. We don’t know what Rhiannon did to her, her life could be in danger.”

Keith walked away for a moment, retrieving his gun out of the puddle that it had fallen into. Grumbling to himself, he wiped the mud off of it with the hem of his rain soaked jacket. The cold wind and rain was starting to get to all of us now, and I could start to see frost forming on the windshield of the vehicle. I thought about the night one year ago when we had escaped the FEC base, and we were standing outside in the rain like this, saying goodbye to Brock. It made my heart hurt thinking about him, I still felt responsible and guilty for letting him go back to Burnley and throw his life away, and I knew that this was a burden that I would forever carry with me. I wanted to see Brock again, just one more time to tell him how sorry I was and that….even through everything that happened…I still loved him. I was suddenly aware of Keith grabbing my arm and pulling me off to the side of the vehicle. Startled out of my thoughts, I stared curiously at him. “Yeah so, Shaun is in there.” He said, pointing the gun in the direction of the entrance of Dawn. “I agreed to help you do this because I wanted to get him out of here so we can go back home, and you want to snuff out Rhiannon, which by the way I am still not okay with, but the point is that we need to get in there, and now. Every minute that we waste out here, this storm gets worse.”

I could feel the animosity in Keith’s tone growing. I held up my hands and tried to calm him down. “Yes, I know that, but we can’t just rush right in. Selene, or whatever she has become stands in our way and I am not going to put her in danger. I already told you that she’s Thomas’s mother, and I am sure that he’s not…..” Seeing movement out of the corner of my eye, I looked back towards the front of the vehicle and I saw Thomas starting to slowly approach her. The moment he took one step forward, she brought her weapon down and held it in a defensive position. The strange, purple energy that surrounded it seemed to intensify in color. I pushed Keith out of my way and went over to him. “Hey Thomas, what are you doing? This is dangerous, take a step back and let us figure this out okay?”

The wind blew the curls of Thomas’s hair around his pale face, and I could see that his gaze was locked onto hers. Not seeming to hear me, he took another step forward, and Selene shifted the scythe from one hand to the other, lowering it slightly and pointing it at him. Keith tried to move in front of me, but I pushed him away. “Thomas, hey… do you hear me? Stop! Whatever you’re planning, this isn’t going to turn out well, so knock it off already.”

Merely a few feet away from her, I saw a tear slide down his cheek. “I can’t feel her anymore, Dustin. I can’t hear her voice inside my head anymore. All I can feel is cold and numbness surrounding her.” He looked at me for a moment, not turning his head away from her. “She feels like Brock…she feels…dead.”

The wind had picked up now, ripping the leaves off the nearby trees and sending them flying all around us. The crows clutched onto the branches, silently waiting. “What?” I shouted. It was difficult to hear him. “Thomas come on, back up, let’s get inside, and try to think it through.” I put my hand on his arm, meaning to guide him away, but he suddenly lashed out, putting both of his hands on my chest and giving me a quick shove. Losing my balance momentarily, I pitched backwards and fell against a startled Keith.

Finally turning to look at me, Thomas shouted over the wind and rain. “She’s my MOTHER; I need to know what happened to her! She won’t hurt me, I know she won’t.” In an agitated state, he stormed forward, ignoring the fact that she had brought her weapon down and had the blade aimed at him. As he got close to her, she reached up and pulled the hood of her cloak down, and their eyes met, and for the first time, I could see just how deep those black empty orbs went. Thomas was right, there was nothing left of her. A shiver went down my spine and I stood there, watching helplessly as he approached her with his arms outstretched. “If there is anything left of you inside, mother…please…show me. I need to know what happened.”

Selene stretched out her arm and her sleeve flew back. I could see that the white skin beneath the material had a repulsive gray corpse like color to it, and the rotting veins that ran underneath her flesh crept up her wrist to her elbow like a spider web. I started to move forward, and Keith grabbed me, pulling me backwards. “Leave him be. This is his mother, it’s his choice.” I glared at him, and tried to shrug him off, but he was right, I couldn’t interfere between a mother and her son, and maybe he could be the one to get through to her.

Reaching out, Selene slowly brought her hand forward, towards Thomas and placed it on his chest. High above, the lightning crashed, reminding us of the eminent danger surrounding us. Thomas looked up from the hand on his chest to Selene, his eyes silently pleading, begging her. I sensed a brief moment of hesitation. I didn’t know what had happened to her, or what was going to happen to Thomas, but whatever it was, I knew it wasn’t going to be good. I could have probably broke free from Keith, who was holding me in place, but at that moment I didn’t want to. Fate had brought us here and we had to see this through, I was powerless to stop it. There was a crackling sound in the air once again and I saw Thomas close his eyes, just as a wave of the purple energy shot forth from Selene’s fingertips, flowing through her arm and into his chest. He screamed out in pain as the light surrounded him, sending his body instantly into convulsions. I looked to Selene, expecting to see some reaction on her face to seeing her son’s pain, but all I could see was a emotionless mask of nothingness. She shifted slightly, and arched her fingers, digging the tips of them into his chest and I could see tiny pin pricks of blood start to stain the front of his jacket. For several minutes, this went on until eventually she pulled her arm back and Thomas dropped down to his knees, splashing in a small pool of water with his head bowed down. Keith let go of me and I hurried over to him, sloshing my way over the wet road. “Thomas what the fuck was that?”

He opened his eyes and turned to me, and I could see that they were tinged with red and filled with tears. His bottom lip was quivering slightly. “I was right, Dustin that's not Selene, she’s dead. Aaron killed her.”

My jaw dropped open and I felt like someone had kicked me right in the stomach. All the breath left my lungs and it was hard to breathe. “That can’t be! Aaron is on our side! He’s back at the Shallow Bay with Ben!” I took hold of both of Thomas’s arms, pulling on his wet jacket furiously. “This is wrong! It has to be! It’s all Rhiannon’s doing! She brainwashed Selene and turned her into this… this thing… she’s making you see things that aren’t true, this is all a lie…it has to be!”

“I wish it was, oh god how I wish it was. I saw it all. I saw it all happen. A month ago, Aaron lured Selene out to the desert, to get your book from her under Rhiannon’s orders. When we she wouldn’t give it to him, he shot her in the head.” Thomas closed his eyes tightly, and took a long deep breath. “The sun beat down on her long black coat that billowed out around her, as she stood there defiantly. Time stood still. She looked into his eyes, into the eyes of the murderer that she once called friend and stared him down. I felt the bullet go right into her. I felt it penetrate the skull, shattering the bone and destroy her brain. The pain…there was so much pain and noise. It was everywhere all at once. She wouldn’t fall though; she stayed there, on her knees in front of him, brain dead and yet still alive, not willing to accept defeat, tears streaming down her cheeks and the crows calling loudly behind her. Were they calling for her death or welcoming her to the darkness? I don’t know which. She had something to live for…the children. Every part of her wanted to stay and protect them, as she could not protect her own son so long ago. An empty, lifeless tear ran down over her cheek as he put his foot against her chest and pushed her off the cliff. As the ground raced up to meet her, all her eyes could focus on were the feathers of the crows fluttering down around her, gleaming with a beautiful black iridescence. It comforted her. She wanted to sleep there forever.”

I let go of Thomas’s jacket and sat back, my heart numbed with the reality of his words sinking in. Selene had been missing and none of us knew it. We… no… I had let her drive away from me on that last day, smiling and foolishly thinking that she would be safe. The FEC was destroyed, Prox was restored, and there was nothing out there that could possibly harm her. But it wasn’t the FEC… it was the messengers, it was one of our own men that ended her life, someone who we had taken into our trust and treated like he was part of our family. We let the wolf in. We fed it. There was no one else to blame. There was so much anger inside of me, not necessarily toward Aaron, but towards myself. “FUCK!” I shouted, as loudly as I could into the night, not caring who heard it.

Feeling Thomas looking at me, I managed to calm myself down. His soft brown eyes were filled with such sorrow; it was almost too much to bear. I wanted to go home, back to Ben and forget about all of this. “There’s more you should know.” He said quietly. I could tell that things were about to get much worse. I wanted him to stop talking, I didn’t want to hear anymore, but I had to. Deep down inside, I felt the weight of the enormity of it all sliding down on top of me, and I knew that there was no way to escape. “Rhiannon didn’t do this to Selene.”

My hands were trembling and a pit opened up in my stomach before I even asked. “Who did?” The wind blew the raindrops into my eyes, where they sliced mercilessly into them with a painful force.

Looking up at Selene, who was still standing over him, Thomas was overcome with emotion and refused to answer, shaking his head. “I can’t… I just can’t… Please Dustin don’t make me…”

Something inside of me snapped and I stood up, I grabbing hold of Thomas and dragging him to his feet and pulling him back away from her. I wanted this over with, and Thomas was only prolonging it. Keith was trying to get between us, but I batted him away with a flick of my hand. This was not his business. The weight from Thomas’s water logged clothes made him feel like he weighed double, but I didn’t care. I needed an answer. Giving him a shake, I snarled at him. “Fucking tell me who did this to her, right now Thomas, or I swear I will beat it out of you!”

“Whoa whoa whoa…” Keith was grabbing hold of my arms again, persistent as ever, trying to get me off of Thomas. “Calm the fuck down. Everyone just calm the fuck down.”

Not letting go of Thomas, I jerked his body harshly. “I am not going to ask you again, tell me who did this to her! Right fucking now!”

“BENJAMIN!!” Thomas shouted, his voice louder and stronger than the booms of thunder rolling over head. “Benjamin did this!!”

I let go of him and turned around, walking back to the vehicle. I suddenly felt lightheaded and weak. Reaching out, I put my hands on the hood to support my weight and lowered my head, trying to convince myself that this was a dream. The rain dripped down off my head and onto my glasses, obscuring my vision. With a shaking hand, I reached up and pulled them off, clutching the plastic frames tightly in my hand. “He’s become the Shepherd of the Damned, hasn’t he?” I asked quietly.

“Yes.” Thomas answered.

Swallowing back the bile that had risen up into my throat from my stomach, I closed my eyes. My worst fears were coming true. I had failed him. I failed the man that I loved, lost him forever. Closing my hand tightly, I crushed the glasses in the palm of my hand, and felt the plastic snap and the glass lenses start to shatter. The momentary pain of the shards digging into my flesh distracted me for a moment, and I wiped the tears out of my eyes with my damp shirt. “Why…why did he do it? What could have possibly led him to throw away all that we had to become that fucking demon? Wasn’t I enough for him?”

Stepping into the light from the headlights, Thomas kept his distance from me. “It wasn’t you, it was Aaron. He lured Benjamin out to where he murdered Selene, under Rhiannon’s orders. She saw him as a potential threat and wanted to get rid of him. They fought, it got pretty bloody, and in the end, Benjamin beat Aaron to within an inch of his life but also at the same time, Benjamin was exhausted and near to the point of breaking himself. The lack of sleep and his mentally agitated state weakened him, so he stopped. Unable to put himself at risk, he decided to spare him. Benjamin showed Aaron mercy. Then out of nowhere, he felt the power of the Eden drug suddenly take hold. It flowed through his veins and spoke to him, seducing him with the same intoxicating power that Burnley was addicted to. All he had to do was take a life and he would be free of his mortal body; free to defend Prox and all those he loved from this new threat. Selene tried to warn him, but it was too late. As Benjamin delivered the killing blow that ended Aaron’s life, it gave him a new, more terrifying one as the Shepherd of the Damned. Selene turned away from him, unable to look upon the monster that he had become. In her eyes, he had succumbed to the evil that we all had been fighting so hard against and she felt powerless to stop him…she was right.”

I watched the rain bead up and slide down over the hood of the vehicle. I no longer felt cold, or numb, but instead raw and wounded. I couldn’t wrap my head around what was going on, I didn’t know how Benjamin could just toss away everything that we had and become this.. this.. thing. We loved each other… he wanted to marry me. How was this even possibly happening now? I tossed the ruined glasses down onto the ground. “Where is Ben now?” I asked, through clenched teeth.

“I couldn’t see everything, there are still pieces missing. I saw Selene confront Benjamin for a second time here at the gate; he was carrying something in his arms, sheltering it from the rain. I don’t know what it could have been, but whatever it was, it was incredibly precious to him. Selene appeared before him, her soul still free to walk on Prox, and begged with him to give up his current plan of action. She stared into those awful amber colored eyes, trying to plead her case and speak to the noble man inside, but it was of no use. He mocked her, he beat her down to her knees, feeling her screams fuel him just like he had done to Aaron. Then used his power, the power of the Shepherd of the Damned to corrupt her soul and turn it into what you see now. Even in death, she has received no peace. He made her stand watch over Dawn, a cruel mockery of death itself, until his work is done.” Thomas’s eyes shifted from me, to the steps behind Selene which led deep into Dawn. “Benjamin is in there, I can feel him, his dark presence descends over everything like a plague. He’s going to kill again.”

I took a deep breath. “Thomas, how do you know all of this? How are you seeing these things?”

Thomas frowned, crossing his arms over his chest and rubbing his arms. “I am not sure, but ever since Keith removed that visor, I started to ‘feel’ things. I think that it did something to my brain, and opened me up to be more receptive of things around me. Either that, or because Selene is...” His voice trailed off, and he fell silent, choosing to keep the rest of his thoughts to himself.

“I’ve had enough of this talking. Fucking hell, Shaun’s in there!” Keith muttered and pulled out his gun. “If the two of you won’t do anything about it, then for fuck’s sake I am going to.”

“Keith, NO!” I turned around just in time to see him move past me and toward the steps. He covered the distance between where we all were standing and the gates in a matter of seconds, bringing the weapon up and starting to fire. I heard the loud blasts before I even saw the flashes of light illuminate the area. With each step that he took, the trigger pulled back and he fired. Again and again and again, each of the blasts rang out into the night, frightening the crows who took to the sky in a whirl of black feathers. They called loudly, filling my ears with their raucous cries and what seemed like laughter. With each shot, Selene tumbled backwards, moving closer to the gates as Keith drew near. Her steps were faltering under the enormous barrage of electric blasts that hit their mark. Weakened, she fell back against the gate, obviously wounded and unable to retaliate against him. Keith approached her and she had nowhere to go now, he had backed her into a corner and severely weakened her. I saw her hands grip the scythe and the familiar purple energy start to flow through it once again. Nearly upon her, Keith continued to shoot not giving her the opportunity to recover, the bolts each connecting with her body and hitting their mark dead center. It was too much damage all at once, and I saw her start to slump over, clutching at her chest while still holding the scythe in one hand. He wasn’t trying to just kill her, he was punishing her and it was horrifying to watch.

Confident that he had the upper hand; Keith came to stand right in front of her and held the gun out, pushing the barrel to her forehead. “I don’t want to do this, but that’s my friend in here. We didn’t ask to come here, and we don’t want any part in your war. It didn’t need to come to this but since you won’t let us pass, I have to kill you. I guess that ‘I’m sorry’ should be the right thing to say here, but the truth is that I am not sorry. I won’t stop at anything to protect the ones that I love.” I heard the distinct sound of the laser pistol warming up once again as he held it against her, and I could see his finger start to pull back on the trigger. “I wish Ben could have saved you, just like he saved the rest of us.” Keith’s finger moved, the final bolt of electricity collected inside the power reservoir, and started to move toward Selene’s head, when suddenly there was the sound of crackling energy which permeated the air. Looking down at his weapon, Keith stared in disbelief. The thin waves of purple energy that surrounded Selene’s scythe crept up and infiltrated the laser pistol, completely disabling it with crippling energy. “Oh fuck.” Keith said, as he quickly turned the weapon around and started to pummel the handle of it against Selene’s head. As each blow rained down upon her, she slowly started to rise again, and a terrifying smile started to creep over her black lips. Knowing that he was in trouble, Keith turned around, trying to make his way back over to the vehicle as fast as he could. Behind him, Selene waved her hand and purple vines of electricity shot up from the ground, wrapping around his feet and ankles. The momentum of his sprint caught him off guard, and Keith fell, face first down to the ground, his weapon clattering across the ground and coming to a stop at my feet.

The birds high above were calling out, screaming and yelling in triumphant victory as Selene stepped forward. The long black robes that once hung from her like a death shroud were now torn and shredded from the force of the bolts from Keith’s gun, and now they flapped in the wind like the feathers of a bird. I saw her raise the scythe high over her head, and I bent down, scooping the gun up and holding it in trembling hands. Thomas gave me a terrified look, and I knew what he was thinking; it was the same thing that I was. She had to be stopped. He was giving me the silent ‘okay’ to shoot her. The crows were calling, louder and louder, the thunder booming, crashing in my ears, filling my head with a mass confusion that was nearly driving me insane. I looked into Selene’s eyes, and was repulsed by the swirling clouds of darkness. This wasn’t her, this was a abomination that Ben had created to stop us, and it had to be destroyed. I brought the weapon up, prepared to shoot, but fighting the lingering doubt inside of my head. I was ready to kill Rhiannon, to murder her in cold blood for a crime that she had not even committed yet, so why was it so hard to pull the trigger now? Looking down, I saw Keith staring at me with wide eyes. He knew that he was about to die. I had to do something.

The silver and black scythe crackled with a mesmerizing beautiful purple energy as Selene held it in her hands, and started to bring it down, sending it swinging into the cold night air with ease. Aiming right for her, I closed my eyes and pulled the trigger and then heard a loud scream of pain, followed by a petrifying gurgle that made my skin crawl. Slowly opening my eyes, I saw that Selene still stood, ‘alive’ and well. Confused, I looked at the gun in my hand and frowned. All the power had been depleted from Keith’s constant, repetitive shooting, it didn’t have enough time to power back up after she disabled it and it was dead. Tossing it away, I moved away from the front of the vehicle, letting the headlights wash over the road in front of me, and my heart stopped.

“NO! OH MY FUCKING GOD NO!” I screamed and dropped down to my knees in the mud and slop, just as Selene jerked her arm back and removed the scythe from her son’s split open chest. Thomas turned and looked right at me as the silver blade broke free from the bones it had just cracked and the flesh it had torn, releasing a spray of bright red blood and he fell. Selene slowly backed away, lowering the weapon and dragging it behind her in the ground as she returned to the gates once again, the crows joining her and calling out in victory. Keith scrambled away from where he had fallen and grabbed hold of Thomas before he hit the ground.

Keith looked at me with wide eyes. There was a splatter of Thomas’s blood on his clothes. “She was going to kill me…but he… he.. , he jumped in front of me, he stopped the blade. I am sorry. I am so sorry Dustin. It wasn’t my fault. I couldn’t stop him.”

I crawled through the puddles of water on all fours, anxious to get to him and pushed Keith away, grabbing hold of Thomas’s body. I didn’t want him touching him. He had done enough damage. “GET AWAY FROM HIM; JUST GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM HIM!” I screamed. Without another word, I watched Keith get up and slowly walk back to the vehicle. He didn’t appear to be physically hurt, but there was a look of guilt in his eyes that was deeper than the ocean. I didn’t care where he went; I just wanted him out of my sight. I managed to lift Thomas’s shoulders slightly and I slipped my legs underneath him to support his weight as best I could. The rain was starting to flood the area now and the cold water easily came up two or three inches off the ground, soaking into everything, mixing with bright red splashes of blood. Looking down at the gaping wound in his chest, I felt sick and disgusted. The razor sharp blade had easily sliced through the thin flight jacket that he wore and bit deeply into his breast bone, neatly cleaving it in two. There were massive pools of blood bubbling up from his chest and every single time he drew a breath it spilled out and down over the sides of his body. Looking down, I could see parts of his lungs and heart exposed, lacerated and hanging with shredded bits of flesh hanging loosely from the muscle that once held them in place. I knew that I had to get him help, but no matter what I did, none would come in time. The Shallow Bay was too far away from us, and there was good chance that he might not even survive the ride home, so that was out of the question. Dawn was right in front of us, but Selene would never let us pass. Judging from the massive amount of damage done, and the amount of bleeding, I knew that it didn’t matter anyway. Thomas was dying, and there was nothing I could do but attempt to make him as comfortable as I could. Being careful not to move him around much, I slipped out of my jacket and balled it up as tightly as I could, shoving it into the wound. As soon as I started to apply pressure, his eyes fluttered open and he looked up at me with his deep brown eyes.

“Is everyone okay?” He asked in a quiet voice. Turning his head slightly, he glanced over to the gates that Selene still guarded. “Where’s Keith? Did he get injured?”

I managed to produce a small, fake smile of reassurance. “Ya he’s fine. I sent him away to get some help; we are going to get you back up and on your feet so that you can go home back to your kids, Thomas. Just hang in there and stay with me. We got this taken care of.” I lied. How could I tell the man in my arms that he was dying? The rain still relentlessly poured down over us, and I brought a hand up to his face, gently pushing the waterlogged curls away from his eyes, and noticed that my fingers which held the jacket in place were covered in blood. He was hemorrhaging, and I had no way of stopping it. “Thomas, why did you do that? Why did you jump in front of Keith?”

Thomas started to cough violently. Turning his head to the side, I could see a thin trickle of blood form on his lips. “My wife’s a nurse, and I know what a fatal wound looks like, so don’t bother lying to me about these things, I am dying, Dustin. I escaped death once before, I think that it’s finally caught up with me. There’s no coming back this time.” His eyes fluttered a little, and I knew that he was trying to ignore the blinding pain. “I saved Keith because he was in danger, you would have done the exact same thing too. It’s a great honor to save lives, even if it is just one, because somewhere down the line, someone might return the favor and save someone else. Besides… Selene is my mother…I thought that I had a chance and maybe for one moment, I could stop her. I honestly never thought she’d hurt me. She swore to me that she never would. A mother couldn’t hurt her own child, right?” A spasm of pain wracked his body, and I saw him shudder as it overwhelmed him for a moment, and tears started to stream down his cheeks. After the moment passed, he relaxed in my arms again. “What happened? Did she go away?”

I turned to look at the woman standing at the gates. This wasn’t Selene, it wasn’t his mother. This was something even more terrible, a soul twisted, deformed and reformed into a horrifying mockery of a person. I remembered what the child Burnley had warned me about a few hours earlier. He told me that Death was waiting for me at Dawn, and then touched my fingertips, leaving bloody prints behind on my hand. He was right. Death was guarding the gates, wearing the guise of someone that we once knew, and the bloody fingerprints were a grim premonition of Thomas’s blood that now stained my own hands. I hated Burnley even more now, because he was trying to warn me, and I didn’t listen. “Don’t worry about her, Thomas. Everything is going to be alright. I promise.” I answered feebly. Once again, a lie slipped out of my mouth. Seeing people die had happened too many times before, and I swore to myself that it would never happen again, but yet here I was, sitting on the ground, outside in the rain, watching one of my best friends die in my arms. I didn’t know what to say to him, I could tell that he was in so much pain, suffering with each breath that he took, and I hated myself for thinking that I just wanted it to be over. I wanted him to die.

“Dustin…I want you to know that I never hated you.”

I felt the blood start to seep through the material that I had pressed against his chest, and drip down the sides. His face was ashen white with a tinge of blue to his lips. He was fading fast. I didn’t want to talk about any of this. I wanted to hold him in my arms and cradle his shattered body in the rain for as long as I could. Words were useless here. “Shhh…please don’t talk anymore. You will waste your energy.”

Thomas reached out and placed his hand on my arm. It felt like it weighed a thousand pounds. Even though he was in pain, he had stopped shaking and his touch was steady and reassuring. “I am so tired, my eyes are heavy and all I want to do is close them, but I can’t…not until I speak my peace with you.”

I slid one of my hands out and took hold of his. It was probably a mistake releasing some of the pressure on his chest, but I wanted to feel his hand in mine. I wanted to be holding onto him when he was no longer able to draw another breath. He had stayed by my side for so long, a faithful and wonderful friend, and I needed to be there for him as well. Lacing my fingers through his, I choked back the lump in my throat and nodded to him. “Whatever you need to say, Thomas, its fine, just say it.”

Leaning his head back, he let the cold rain descend over him. It washed off some of the flecks of blood, giving him a shred of dignity back. “When I brought you to Eden, and saved you from the FEC, I knew that my time with Benjamin was over. He never told me that he loved you, and he didn’t need to. I saw it in his eyes the moment I brought you in. There was… no…. there IS such an intense love there, it’s almost indescribable. I was foolish to do what I did and try to win is affections back, but you have to understand that, just like you, I lost part of myself to that man, and I would do anything to have him back. During all that time, I never hated or was jealous of you because I knew that I had to let Benjamin go, and I felt goodness in you, and it was that goodness that he needed.” Thomas’s fingers tightened around mine. “I don’t believe that Benjamin has totally succumbed to darkness, not completely…and the reason why is because of you. You are the one thing that can set him free. You need to go to him and free him… fuck this Shepherd of the Damned shit… that’s Benjamin in there, the man who we both love. Everyone else has given up on him… but don’t listen to them… go in there and find him, save him, from himself, before it’s too late. Promise me that you will try…”

I couldn’t stop crying now. My heart was hurting so badly and I wished that it would just stop. His hand was so cold; it felt like I was holding onto ice. I moved in a little closer, trying to shield him from the rain and offer him a little warmth in the last moments of his life. He didn’t deserve this. “Yes.” I whispered. “I will save Ben. I promise.” Part of me regretted saying those words, because I didn’t even know if saving Ben was possible, and if I couldn’t, then that would be one more lie that I spoke to a dying man. I positively hated myself.

Moving slightly, Thomas slipped his hand out of mine and slid his wedding ring off his finger. Holding it in the palm of his hand, the metal gleamed brightly, even saturated with blood and in the darkness of night, it was the most brilliant thing I had ever seen. Offering it to me, he managed to smile slightly. “I want you to have this. Take it back to Lizzie please, and tell her that I love her.” His body started to shake again, and I could feel his breathing become more shallow. “Tell her that I am sorry that I couldn’t be around to see our boys grow up, or to see her garden bloom…she always gave life to the most beautiful things.” Thomas closed his eyes, and his voice grew weaker. “All of her roses were always white, in the garden… except for one… I can see it now, it’s hidden away, out of plain sight, but it’s there… it hasn’t opened yet… but it will soon… it’s going to be the most brilliant of them all…it’s not white.. It’s the colors of a painted sunset, red, yellow, orange.. Like the embers of a fire… that are dying… I wish.. I could see it bloom…”

I felt a hand touch my shoulder and Keith’s voice call out. “Dustin?” I glance down at Thomas, at his body soaked through with rain and blood and felt a wave of grief wash over me. I clutched him close to me. I wasn’t going to let anyone take him away from me. “Dustin…we need to get him inside the vehicle, okay?”

My head snapped up and I stared at Keith. “What the fuck are you talking about? He’s dying and you want me to waste his last moments moving him around? Why the fuck would you even consider that? You are the reason this happened! Just get the hell out of here and leave us in peace!”

“I managed to connect to The Shallow Bay. They have started to transmit a signal. Someone named Lizzie is asking for him.” Keith said quietly.

I started to shake. “Are you fucking serious?”

Keith nodded. “Yes, but the connection is weak.” He looked down at Thomas. “I don’t know how much longer it will last. We need to move him.” Not wanting to argue with him anymore, I sighed and moved aside, letting Keith get on the other side of Thomas and together we easily lifted him and took him back to the vehicle. Thomas didn’t whimper or call out in pain, but instead stayed completely quiet, which was quite unsettling. I turned around for a moment and looked behind us at the place where we had been sitting and saw the pool of blood that had collected underneath Thomas’s injured body. The rain was already starting to wash it away, all evidence disappearing and fading.

I slid into the backseat first, and let Keith guide Thomas’s limp body in so that I could support his head and shoulders. He was still breathing, but not responding. I was worried that he wouldn’t get to speak to Lizzie at all, having wasted his last breath begging me to save Benjamin. The inside of the vehicle was warm and dry, and I was grateful to be out of the cold wind and rain. Keith slipped into the front seat and began to fiddle with the communication system as I looked out through the front window to see Selene still standing there, stoic and motionless as ever guarding the gates to Dawn. A shiver went down my spine, knowing that when this was all over, we’d have to deal with her. I didn’t want to think about that. I was losing one friend now; I didn’t want to lose another.

Several long moments passed, and with each one, I could feel Thomas slipping further and further away. In the driver’s seat, Keith worked with the communication system, and then with a sudden cry of triumph he dislodged the removable video screen from the front panel of the vehicle and placed it in the back, in front of me. “Lizzie is on standby, all you have to do is press this button here and you can communicate with her via video message. I don’t know how long the connection will last, so I suggest that you say whatever you have to right away.” He glanced down at Thomas in my arms. “I don’t thin you’ll have very long anyway.” Opening the door, Keith got up from the driver’s seat.

“Wait.” I said, calling after him. “Don’t go back out there…just stay in here where it’s warmer.” I glanced over at Selene again. “…and safer.”

Keith bent down and looked at me and the unconscious Thomas in my arms. “No. You need privacy. I’ll be fine.” Zipping up his hoodie, he carefully shut the door and walked away.

Taking a deep breath, I wiped my face clear of the dirt, tears and blood. I didn’t know what I was going to say. I tried to think about my words, and rehearse some sort of hello to Lizzie, but I couldn’t come up with anything. My mind was blank. Swallowing back the rising lump of emotions into my throat, I hit the green connect button and waited for the call to connect. Part of me wanted it to fail. I didn’t really want to tell her that her husband was dying, but I had to man up and do it. I had to stop running away from my problems and thinking about myself. This moment was for her and Thomas, no one else. The small video screen in front of me that was filled with static soon faded away, and I saw Lizzie on the other end, sitting in the control room of the Shallow Bay, looking worried. “Dustin!! I am so happy to see you. Our last transmission got cut off; I didn’t get to tell you everything that is going on here. You are all in danger! Benjamin has taken---“

“Lizzie. Stop.” I said in a serious tone. Her worried expression suddenly went blank.

All the color faded from her face. She knew it was her husband. I could see it in her eyes. “Where… where… is Thomas?”

I stayed silent for a moment. Reaching down, I felt for a pulse. It was there, faint and fleeting, but he was still hanging on. “Lizzie, I can't explain how it happened right now, but you need to know that Thomas is hurt, badly. He doesn't have much time left. I don’t think that you want to…”

“Let me see him!! Let me see my husband right now, Dustin!!” She shouted, leaning forward, closer to the screen.

Seeing the determined look in her eyes, I knew that I didn’t have a choice. I placed a hand gently on Thomas's shoulder. There didn’t seem to be any life left in him; he lay there motionless and silent. “Thomas. Can you hear me, Lizzie is...” I had to stop for a moment, overcome with emotion. “Lizzie wants to speak to you. Can you…”

I saw his eyes partially open, and his lips part. He tried to speak, but no words came out. I looked into the camera again, and saw Lizzie expectantly waiting to see her husband. I didn’t know what to do. He was nearly gone now. Did I really want her to watch him die in my arms, knowing that she couldn’t reach out and touch him, or comfort him in his last few remaining moments? Cursing underneath my breath, I grabbed hold of the monitor and placed it so that Thomas’s face was in view. There was no need for her to see the terrible gaping wound in his chest. Judging from the amount of drying blood that had pooled up around his neck, she could clearly see how bad it was. The moment he came into view, Lizzie let out a small whimper and put her hands over her mouth. Her eyes started to tear up. I had to look away, I couldn’t watch. Why did this have to happen? Of all people, why Thomas? He only came out here to help save Brock, a completely unselfish act, and now here he was, giving up his life for another. Closing my eyes, I leaned my head against the back of the seat, holding onto Thomas with one hand and clutching his wedding ring in the other.

Lizzie’s voice quivered as she spoke. “Thomas, hey love. I have missed you so much.”

Through blood stained lips, Thomas managed to smile through the pain and find the strength to speak. “Lizzie…… Forgive me… please?”

Shaking her head, the tears ran down Lizzie’s cheeks as she tried her best to keep from falling apart. “No my love, you have nothing to be sorry for.”

“I want to… come home to you… and my boys… I want to walk through the garden… and the greenhouse tunnel… feel the sunlight on my skin… the touch of your hand… listen to the children laughing… playing…” Thomas whispered.

In a small voice, Lizzie tried to comfort him. “When this is all over, everyone will come home and we can be a family again. We can sit outside in the moonlight, and Dustin can tell us stories about the stars, Benjamin can play some music for us, and we can watch the kids playing out in the meadow.” I listened silently as Lizzie’s voice filled with sorrow and sadness. “Selene and Brock will join us too. Everyone will be there. It will be a beautiful night filled with stars and music.” She paused to take a deep breath. “But you have to hold on. You have to stay strong until Dustin can bring you back to me. Then I promise I will patch you up and you’ll be as good as new. I wish I could be there holding your hand, but since I can’t you have to fight…. Fight for your life, because I need you, we all need you.”

I felt Thomas reach forward. With a tremendous amount of pain, he stretched his arm out and touched his bloody fingers to the monitor. “I can’t…do this without you... It hurts… everything hurts so bad Lizzie. Help me… make it stop hurting.”

“Shhh, it’s alright my love. Let me hold your hand.” Lizzie leaned forward and placed her hand on the video display, and for a moment, through the transmission of electronic signals and wires, their fingertips touched. “Close your eyes and listen to my voice. Concentrate on it, and really listen. Do you hear that? It’s the sound of the wind outside, but it’s not a raging storm, it’s the gentle breeze as it blows through the newly planted evergreen trees in the meadow. Can you smell the scent of the wood logs burning on the fire pit? It’s nice and warm here, safe and sound as you are all curled up in my arms. I can feel the soft gentle waves of your hair as I run my fingers through them, lulling you into a sweet slumber. There’s no pain here. No sorrow or worries. This is the place where you were meant to be, a place where you can finally relax and call home. Nothing will harm you here.”

Thomas’s fingers started to slide down the monitor, and his body was becoming cold. The entire backseat was now completely saturated with blood. He was losing the fight. There was nothing I could do to keep him alive anymore. He gazed at the monitor wistfully, a single tear rolling down his cheek. “I don’t want to… die.” He murmured. All the light left Lizzie’s eyes. It was at that moment that she knew that her husband was going to die and had to let go of him. He was suffering in so much pain. There wouldn’t be any lightning fast ride back to the Shallow Bay through the storm just in the nick of time to save his life, and there weren’t any last minute heroic actions that we could take either. This was it, the last moments of his life, and all I could do was sit and watch.

I gazed at Lizzie’s image on the screen. She was trying so hard to keep her emotions in check. “Thomas, you’ve done all that you can. You’ve fought the good fight and now you need to rest.” Suddenly, the door behind Lizzie opened and Scott entered the room. He held a baby in his arms. Lizzie spoke quietly to him, and then he handed the child over to her and left the room without a word. As she wrapped her arms around him, the baby started to cry, and I saw Thomas’s eyes flutter back open. “See? We’re safe. The Shallow Bay is safe. Tristan and I, we’re waiting here for you to come home to us.” Gently, she pulled the blanket down away from the baby’s face and turned him towards the monitor. It wasn’t until that moment that I realized just how much Tristan really did look like Thomas, they both had the same, deep brown eyes, and curly dark hair, a perfect replica of Selene’s.

“My son.” Thomas whispered. A small smile crept across his bloody lips.

“Yes. He’s your son, and I swear to you Thomas, that I will NEVER let anything happen to him.” As Lizzie spoke, I could see that that the monitor started to flicker and flash, static slowly returning to it. We were losing the signal. I wanted to say something, but I couldn’t bring myself to interrupt them.

Thomas took a breath and his body started to shake violently. I grabbed him in my arms and tried to hold him together. There was so much blood now. His head lulled back and I grabbed the monitor, turning it away. I heard Lizzie complaining, calling out to me, and demanding to see her husband. Thomas started to make a obscene gurgling sound, as he tried to take air in through the lacerated and crushed lungs that wouldn’t work. I held him tightly as he coughed and convulsed rapidly, his body in the last throes of the dying process. After a moment or two, the spasms subsided and he went limp. I hoped that this was the end; I couldn’t take much more of this. I hated myself for wishing that he was dead, but I wanted him to be free of all this pain. He didn’t deserve this. Suddenly his eyes shot open fully and he moaned. “Where is…. Baby…. Benjamin…. Where …. Is … my … other son?” Thomas’s fingers grabbed hold of my shirt. “Dustin… where is… he?” I shook my head, and said nothing. I didn’t know where he was. I was done lying to a dying man.

Another stream of blood rushed out of his mouth, I shifted his body and tried to turn him on his side to stop him from gagging on it, and shoved the monitor further away, causing it to fall down to the floor. I glanced at it and saw Lizzie’s face, in a panic calling for him, but the signal was almost gone. The shallow rise and fall of Thomas’s chest had stopped and he went motionless and limp in my arms. The storm outside crashed madly around us with thunder and lightening and soon mixed with my angered shrieks of rage. Thomas stopped breathing completely. He was dead. I grabbed hold of him and cradled him in my arms. This couldn’t be happening. I refused to accept it. Through my tear filled eyes, I could see that the monitor that was lying on the floor shifted to complete static for a moment and then the display went black, leaving me immersed in darkness and grief. 

I sat there for a long time in the dark, feeling absolutely nothing and everything all at the same time. This was supposed to be a simple mission, just a quick trip to save a soul from fading away, how the hell did things get to this point? Where was the point where I lost control? Everything was going to be okay, I had Ben, Thomas and Lizzie had their family, the Shallow Bay was safe, and now, now everything was upside down and falling apart. It felt like the world was ending. All of this was my fault. It was because of my stupid mistake that it was happening. It all came back to that careless kiss between Brock and I in the infirmary. I knew that the choices I made were going to have consequences, but I didn’t care. I did what I did because I wanted Benjamin. He was my everything… and now the hopeless love and devotion I had for him was the cause of death and destruction. Selene was right. Prox was going to be destroyed, not by war and anger, but instead by love. I felt sick. I never gave her words any thought or credit. I assumed they were just ramblings by a crazy woman who saw things. Now I knew how others felt towards me and the message that Starset was trying to spread on Earth. No one would listen to us, because no one believed in us. Now the tables were turned and I was one of the ignorant people, and it made me feel repulsed.

I released Thomas from my arms, letting his body fall back into my lap. The white button down shirt that I was wearing was now stained red with his blood. These were the stains that would forever mark me, no amount of washing or cleaning could ever remove them from my soul. I glanced down at his face, hoping to find a peaceful look there, but instead I noticed that his eyes were open. I gasped to see those chestnut brown irises gazing blindly up at the roof. Before he died, he said that he could ‘see’ things, just like Selene could, and now I couldn’t help but to feel sick about it. Once again, I disbelieved him. How had I become so close minded and foolish? With a shaking hand, I reached up and gently closed his eyes. I wanted to give him peace, it was the only thing I could offer him. I sat there with Thomas in my arms, listening to the rain pound against the roof for what seemed like an eternity, when I heard Keith tap on the window. I didn’t even bother to look up. I didn’t want to be bothered, so I ignored it. I wanted to stay here with my friend and be with him for as long as I could. I owed him that. After a few minutes of me not acknowledging him, Keith opened the driver’s side of the door and slipped in without a sound. The tension in the air between us was so thick that you could taste it.

I reached down and grabbed the communication device, throwing it into the front seat next to him. It landed with a loud thud and I saw him turn and look at it. “Get her back.” I said in a deep, commanding tone. “I don’t care what you need to do, just start the fucking transmission again. I need to speak to Lizzie.”

“I can’t.” Keith whispered. He pointed to the dashboard of the vehicle. There were absolutely no electronic readouts, and no headlights glaring in front of us. “The storm has intensified now, it’s not just thunder and lightning, it’s progressed into an electrical storm. We lost all power. We can’t even drive out of here if we want. We’re stranded.” He tapped his fingers on the steering wheel, but kept his eyes focused on the rain pouring down over the windshield in front of him, he didn’t bother turning around to speak to me. “Hey Dustin, for what it’s worth. I really am sorry.”

“Shut up Keith. I don’t need or want your pathetic attempt at an apology right now. You were the reason Thomas died, own up to it. I won’t ever forgive you for that, so stop asking. And unless you are suggesting a way out of this situation, I don’t want to hear another word from you.” I said, feeling incredibly on edge. I was now very aware of the weight of Thomas’s body in my arms becoming heavier and heavier, but I refused to release him. This was my burden, my grief and I had to take it all.

Pushing his blond hair out of his eyes, Keith finally glanced back at me in the rear view mirror. I knew that he wasn’t comfortable sitting there in silence with me. Each passing moment caused him to grow more anxious and nervous, until he finally found the strength to speak up. “So what’s the plan then? We can’t sit here all night, the road is going to be flooded and we’re at risk of being hit by a bolt of lightning trapped in this metal tin can. I know you’re hurting right now, I don’t mean to be a dick Dustin, but we need to make a decision here.”

My eyes went to Selene’s dark figure standing out at the gates, holding onto the scythe that was still dripping with Thomas’s blood. The scene looked like something right out of a nightmare. I didn’t know what I was supposed to do, Thomas wasn’t supposed to die. How could I be expected to make a decision with one of my friends lying dead on my lap, his blood still fresh on my hands? The idea that this even happened was completely unbelievable. My head hurt and my body felt feverish. I wanted to curl up and close my eyes, maybe sleep for a little while and hope that when I woke up, I’d find that this was all a dream. Somehow, I found my thoughts drifting back towards Burnley and the sinister way that his spirit kept haunting me, and me alone. I was pretty sure that he was trying to get in my way, stop me from entering Dawn because he wanted Rhiannon’s plan to succeed. He was always the master manipulator, turning people against one another so that he could benefit himself. The Shepherd of the Damned taking over Ben had to be his fault too, I could just feel it. Ben would never have lost control on his own, it was Burnley’s doing. I didn’t exactly know how, but I was certain that it was all his fault. Selene, Brock, Thomas, they were all evidence of his treachery, innocent victims who shed blood so that the lunacy of Burnley could continue to exist. I had to stop it. Going into Dawn, I didn’t have a plan, I had no clue what I was going to find in there, but I knew that I this was the right thing to do. Thomas gave up his life because I didn’t listen to him and return to the Shallow Bay. I had to find a way to make it up to him. “We are going to get into Dawn, kill Rhiannon and get Shaun back, and then get the fuck out of here.”

Turning around completely to face me, Keith frowned. “Two problems, one is standing right there in front of us, and she’s a big problem. Our weapons won’t hurt her, and since she just murdered her own son, I am pretty sure that she won’t listen to reason either.”

“You’re the reason why Thomas died, Keith.” I injected. “She wasn’t coming after him, she was going after you. He got in the way to save your fucking life.” I snarled, feeling the anger start to bubble up under my skin.

Keith rolled his eyes. “Whatever Dustin, fucking whatever. All I know is that, that bitch out there isn’t letting anyone through. If you want to go out there, and try to ‘talk’ some sense into her, by all means do so. Maybe you’ve become so immune to every other feeling except for those you have for Ben that you can’t sense how utterly terrifying she is. That’s not your friend Selene out there, that’s Death, and she’s waiting for us. So yeah, go out there and have a chat with her, I’ll just slip by why she’s bisecting you with that overgrown can opener that she has.”

Balling my hand up into a fist, I lunged forward and slammed my knuckles into Keith’s face. As I made impact with his nose, I felt the cartilage snap and saw a line of blood spew out of it as his glasses fell off and disappeared down onto the floor. “I told you to shut up, and I meant it.”

Looking at me as if I were some sort of school yard bully, Keith grabbed his broken, bleeding nose and turned away from me, offended and insulted by my punch. I wasn’t in the mood for even the tiniest bit of sarcasm at the moment, and I wanted him to be very aware of this. I watched him as he ripped off part of this shirt and held it up to his face. We both sat there in silence, watching the water slowly rise up around the tires, not quite knowing what to do. “Shit.” He whimpered. “How are we going to get out of here Dustin?” He said, calmly and quietly. “We can’t defeat her.”

“No. You can’t but I can.” I heard a familiar voice speak in a hushed tone that made me jump almost right out of my skin. Right on cue another bolt of lightning illuminated the sky and I could see Brock sitting in the passenger’s seat of the vehicle next to Keith. He looked the same as I had seen him earlier before leaving Eden, except maybe a little more worn out and tired. My first reaction was to reach out and hug him, but that was an utterly ridiculous idea. Brock was dead and so were the feelings I had for him… or was I just fooling myself by thinking this? Either way, I had to try and keep myself focused, and not allow my emotions to take over. Turning around, he looked to Thomas’s body that I still held in my arms. “I am sorry, Dustin. I never wanted to put any of you in danger, or lure Benjamin away from you. I felt like Prox was my home now, and much like Thomas, I wanted to protect it. Rhiannon used me too, just like the rest of you. She knew that I’d find a way to seek you all out, and bring you here. I should have let the darkness take me and faded into the nothing. If I had, then none of this would have ever happened.”

I couldn’t stand to see the look of sorrow on Brock’s face. “You stayed because you felt that you had to, Brock.” I leaned forward and hovered my hand over his shoulder for a moment. I wanted to touch him, but I was afraid. I needed to feel him once again, not just spiritually but physically as well. There was something holding me back from making contact with him. Maybe it was the look in his eyes when I foolishly kissed him goodbye back in the infirmary, or maybe it was the moment that we shared on the cliff overlooking the FEC base moments before he left me which held me back. I wasn’t sure what it was, only that I couldn’t do it. I pulled my arm back before he could see me and caught sight of Thomas’s wedding ring sitting on the seat next to me. This wasn’t just the symbol of the love that Thomas and Lizzie had for each other, but for the companionship, trust and faith that we as friends, all shared. Thomas died believing in that, and I knew that if a feeling like that was worth dying for, then it was good enough for me. Quietly, I slipped his ring on my finger and the moment it touched my skin, I started to feel things again.

I looked over at Keith, sullen and silent, who only wanted to get Shaun and go home. His one sin was that he cared too much for the ones that he loved. It was a crime that I had committed myself far too much. Lying in my arms, Thomas had finally found his peace, and had placed his trust in me that I could not only save myself, but save Benjamin as well. Earlier when we were outside, Thomas was telling me about the Shepherd of the Damned, all I could think about was how horrible Ben had become. I had closed my mind and my heart to the fact that maybe I could be the one to save him. I had given up without trying, and it was wrong. I would find Benjamin and bring him home. Thomas wanted me to.

Finally, I came to Brock. I couldn’t deny what I was feeling inside anymore. Once again I reached out for him, and as my arm brushed over the seat, he turned to look at me, and every doubt that I had fell away in those beautiful eyes. I had a feeling that he wanted to pull away from me, but instead of letting him move forward, I placed my hand down onto his shoulder, feeling the soft satin of his flight jacket underneath my fingertips. Expecting to feel the eerie coldness that surrounded his spirit, I was surprised to feel how warm and inviting he was now. Something had changed.

I let go of everything inside of me all at once and began to speak, my voice slowly filling with strength. “Only once in your life, I truly believe, you find someone who can completely turn your world around. The things that seem insignificant to most people such as a note, song or walk become invaluable treasures kept safe in your heart to cherish forever. In their presence, there’s no need for continuous conversation, but you find you’re quite content in just having them nearby. Things that never interested you before become fascinating because you know they are important to this person who is so special to you. You think of this person on every occasion and in everything you do. Simple things bring them to mind like a pale blue sky, gentle wind or even a storm cloud on the horizon. You open your heart knowing that there’s a chance it may be broken one day and you experience a love and joy that you never dreamed possible. You find that being vulnerable is the only way to allow your heart to feel true pleasure that’s so real it scares you. You find strength in knowing you have a true friend and possibly a soul mate that will remain loyal to the end. Life seems completely different, exciting and worthwhile. Your only hope and security is in knowing that they are a part of your life.” The sorrowful expression on Brock’s face softened up. He reached up and put his hand on top of mine. “That’s why you did it, Brock, that’s the real reason why. It wasn’t out of duty to save Prox, or because you needed redemption. It was because your heart spoke to you. And maybe I am not the person to make you feel this way, maybe I am, but I know that is what is inside of you, and what makes you do the things that you do.”

Brock started to say something and then suddenly stopped. He looked down to the blood speckled wedding ring on my finger and instantly drew away as if his hand were on fire. “We need to get you both into Dawn, as quickly as possible.” He said in a strangely curt tone. “We’re wasting time here.”

“Yeah that’s what I said.” Keith murmured underneath his makeshift tissue. I could see that there were already purple and blue bruises forming under his eyes from where I had hit him.

My mind reeled, I couldn’t understand how or why the mood of things suddenly shifted, but I had no choice but to go along with it. “Alright, what are you suggesting?” I asked.

Brock tilted his head in the direction of where Selene was. “You can’t hurt her, she’s a spirit, a very dark and terribly twisted one at that. Your weapons are useless against her and the moment that you approach those gates, she’s going to cut you down. Benjamin is the one that placed her on this post, and commanded her to defend it at all costs. She’s a vengeful spirit, fueled by hatred and rage, and will do exactly what he has asked her to do, killing at will until he is satisfied. I suspect that the only reason that Thomas was able to get near her is because he has the same gift that she has, and she didn’t see him as a threat.” Looking back at where Thomas was lying in the back seat of the vehicle, Brock shook his head. “It was foolish to rush in without thinking the whole thing through, he sacrificed himself for nothing. The one shot that you had to get through, you wasted.” Taking a long breath, Brock glanced up from Thomas to me. There was something in his eyes that I saw once before and it chilled me to the bone. I knew what he was planning before he even said it. “There is another way.”

“No Brock. Not this time. You don’t get to sacrifice yourself for others, not now, not ever again. You said that your soul is fading away each time that you manifest yourself like this. There can’t be much of you left, if you take her on, you’re going to lose, I just know it. It’s like you don’t care anymore! I won’t allow it. No one else gets to die here tonight.” I snapped at him. I was expecting Brock to come back at me with some remark or rebuttal, but instead he opened up the passenger side door and stepped outside. Keith turned and looked at me in confusion, expecting me to explain the situation but I didn’t have time for him. As Brock slammed the door shut behind him, I gently laid Thomas’s body down on the seat and slid out from underneath him. Lizzie was probably in hysterics back at the Shallow Bay but there was nothing I could do for her or for him, I had to move on. The moment I stepped outside, the cold air hit me square in the chest, knocking the breath out of my lungs. Since we had taken Thomas inside, the temperature had dropped 20 degrees and the rain had now changed to snow. The ground around us was already fully covered, white and pristine, masking the harsh crimson stains of blood that were hidden underneath. The memory of when we escaped from the FEC base came flooding into my brain, and I had a terrible feeling that history was about to repeat itself. I walked over to Brock who was staring at Selene a few feet away with a concentrated look on his face. I grabbed his arm fiercely. “You aren’t seriously going to go through with this, Brock. This is fucking insane; you are going to die if you take her on.” I searched his face for some sign of humanity, or regret, but found nothing there. “That’s what you want, isn’t it? You want to die?”

Pulling his arm away from me with a look of disgust, Brock’s eyes glared at me. “I am already dead, Dustin. I keep telling you that, why can’t you understand it? The stuff you said just now, about finding someone to love, trust and depend on for your whole life, that was how I felt about you, but you didn’t care! I loved you with everything that I had, but it wasn’t enough. I am tired of wasting my life on you. You can pretend to come to terms with your feelings about me, but the truth is that you never will. So I am going to do something for myself right here and now.”

His words hurt me more than I could ever imagine. “Brock, I thought we were over this?” I said quietly. The soft snow falling down around us blanketed everything with a gentle touch that made shouting almost sinful.

“I don’t know what’s going on inside your head anymore Dustin, and I don’t care. Rhiannon is in there, she needs to be stopped so that’s what I am going to do. I’ll get you a way in, all you need to do is go in there and finish the job. What you do with Benjamin afterward is your own choosing. All I care about is Rhiannon. Do me a favor and stop her from….”

“It’s Burnley, isn’t it?” I said, cutting him off in mid-sentence. “You don’t want Rhiannon to bring him back to life do you? It’s not because you want to save baby Ben, or Prox, it’s because you’re afraid of what Burnley might come back as. There’s no way of knowing what memories he will have, how he will act or who he will listen to, and so you would have him trapped in some void forever until he fades away into nothingness, rather than face the truth of what he may become. You’re afraid that his feelings for you weren’t true, and that all he wanted was someone to stay with him while he died. That’s pretty low, even for you, Brock.” I couldn’t help but laugh. “And you all call my actions selfish and greedy…I think you need to take a long hard look at what you’re doing now and why you’re doing it. If that’s not greed, then I don’t know what is.”

Unexpectedly Brock turned to me and putting both hands on my chest lunged forward, pushing me up against the side of the vehicle with a loud thud. I was startled and taken back by this unexpected act of violence from Brock, but the truth was, I deserved it. I didn’t mean for my words to come out as sharp and piercing as they did, but it was too late now, and I couldn’t take them back. As my spine hit the cold, hard metal, I felt a jarring pain that momentarily stunned me, and Keith came rushing to my side as I doubled over in pain. “Dude… are you alright?” He asked in a concerned tone. I looked up at him, with his crooked, bloody, broken nose and the cracked glasses that he had retrieved off of the floor. I honestly felt that he was worried about me. I waited a moment for the pain to subside. I felt it more in my heart than anywhere else. I was wrong to throw such harsh words at Brock, I knew that he meant well, but with Thomas’s death, and Ben becoming the Shepherd of the Damned, my emotions were all over the place.

“Brock… look… I am sorry.” I reached out for his hand through the snow.

Turning away from me, he looked at Selene. All the crows had left, and she was standing alone at the gates, her shoulders covered in a fine layer of frost and her black lips tinged with a slight blue color around the edges. The air around us was thick, and I noticed that the lightning and thunder had stopped. It was strangely calm. As my fingertips reached out for Brock’s hand, he flicked his wrist and there was a bright flash of red and gold that blinded me. As the light subsided, I saw that he was now holding a sword in his hand, a samurai sword that once belonged to Burnley. I couldn’t believe my eyes. “How did you get that? Ben… Ben broke it.” I whispered, unable to tear my eyes away.

Brock kept his eyes focused on Selene. “If you haven’t noticed, Dustin, Benjamin has broken a lot of things.” He turned to look at me and there were tears streaming down his cheeks. “…and people.”

“What am I going to do?” I asked. For the second time today I felt like I was losing someone and my heart was breaking.

Brock pointed the tip of Burnley’s sword toward the steps behind Selene that concealed the entrance to Dawn. I saw a hint of light gleam off the tip of the blade. “After I engage her, you and Keith are going to slip past her while she’s distracted. The moment your feet touch those steps, run, run as fast as you can, as if your life depended on it, and it very well may. Don’t turn around, slow down or look back until you see the steel doors in front of you. No matter what you hear or how much you want to come back here, don’t. I can’t tell you for certain how long I can hold her off, so every moment counts. Go in there and do what you came here for.”

“No Brock. That’s not what I meant. What I meant to say is what am I going to do without you?” A gentle wind picked up and scattered some of the fallen snow around him, giving him an almost ethereal look. “After you died, I made myself happy with being with Benjamin, but even though I was with him, I could always feel you around me. I can’t quite explain it, but I do believe in souls, spirits, ghosts, etc.…and I knew that if you could, you would always be there looking out for me, watching over my shoulder and guiding me from far away.” Thomas’s blood had dampened my shirt and as it caught on the wind, the thick dampness saturating it and making it stick against my skin, freezing me to the bone. I started to shiver. “If you go, I won’t feel this anymore. I won’t feel anything. There will be nothing left but the dark of you in a place inside my heart where you once were.”

Brock walked over and stood in front of me. He was the same height as I but that moment, he felt much taller and much more imposing. As he stood there, dressed in his FEC gear, clutching the weapon of a man that I hated and despised in his hand, I couldn’t help but to think that I had pushed him to this. My eyes fell down on him, on each of the patches on his jacket, and I stared at them in dull fascination. These weren’t just bits of embroidered material that decorated a piece of clothing, these were badges of honor and courage bestowed on him by the FEC, a horrible reminder of a fate that I pushed him to. With a shaking hand, I reached out and touched the raised letters of the patch that bore his name, my fingers slowly sliding over each of the letters.

“I know that you don’t want my apologies, Brock.” I said, keeping my eyes forward and focused on the patch on his chest. I couldn’t lift my eyes; I didn’t really want to see him glaring at me. “…and I am not expecting you to accept them either… but I want you to know that what happened, between us was MY fault, and if I could go back and time and change it, I would.” I took a deep breath, the tip of my finger resting on the last letter of his patch. “I would change everything.”

Gripping the hilt of the sword tightly, Brock stood motionless in front of me. I could feel the waves of warmth surround him. “What would you change, Dustin? What could you possibly change that would make things better?”

 

Feeling the rise and fall of his chest underneath my fingers, I finally managed to look up at him, at the drying stains of tears that hung on his cheeks, glistening in the dim light. Pulling my hand away from his chest, I reached up and with a gentle touch, I wiped the dirt away. “I wouldn’t let you go. I would have made you stay there with me, and made damn sure that you knew what real love felt like.”

 

Brock’s eyes bored into me in a frightful stare. “I can’t believe the audacity you have, Dustin. To stand here, after all that’s happened, and continue to lie to me, telling me what I want to hear is a pretty low thing to do, even for you. You lied to Thomas as he was dying in your arms, and you think that you can get away with the same thing with me? I don’t know how many times we’ve been through this…it always comes down to the same thing over and over. You can’t love me, not like the way you love Benjamin. You think that if you tell me that you love me, I’ll find peace and I’ll be okay, but you have to realize now that isn’t how things work. You can’t make everyone happy so don’t lead me on with promises that you never intend on keeping.”

The snow softly fell down around us as we stood face to face, in what felt like a final goodbye. This would be the last time I’d ever see him, we both knew it. There was so much I wanted to say to him, but all my words fell away like ash on my lips, leaving a bitter taste in my mouth and my lips dry. I wanted to say ‘I’m sorry’ again, but I knew those were the wrong words. They weren’t the ones that he wanted to hear. “All I wanted was to be part of your life, Brock and offer you a little bit of happiness, in return for all that you do for others. You’re so giving and unselfish, always putting others before yourself.” I lowered my head just a little. “I guess I wanted to be like you.”

Brock placed his hand over mine, and held it in place against the side of his face. His warm fingers traced over the cold steel of Thomas’s wedding ring that I wore on my finger. “You did make me believe, for a short time. But the kind of love that you believe in, that’s just make believe, like the stories that Thomas likes to tell Lizzie. It doesn’t really exist. There could never have been a happy ending between you and I. It’s just not meant to be. We have to accept this, there’s no other way. You have to understand though, that what you did to me changed me, it opened my eyes and made me see. You think that I became colder, and uncaring, but that’s just the opposite. I learned that I need to be needed. I need to find someone to take care of, and who can love me and protect me. I found that, but it was too little, too late…and when Burnley died in my arms, I cursed you for showing me this, and at the same time I loved you for setting me free and letting me find him. You’re right when you said that I don’t want Burnley to be reborn, but it’s not because I am afraid of what he may become, it’s because I can’t be with him. He will have a new life here on Prox, one without the sadistic memories of his past, or of the sins he’s committed… and one without me.” Brock let out a quiet sigh and now I knew the truth. “My heart and my soul have been torn between two worlds for long enough. Let me do this so I can be with him, let me be there for him when the darkness comes so that I can show him the way and we can finally be together in peace. I am holding the hand that holds me down, and it belongs to you Dustin. Set me free and let me go.”

I didn’t realize how much I was shaking now. Somewhere behind me, I heard Keith’s feet crunch in the snow. I took a deep breath. “I don’t know how to.”

“Like this.” Brock said, with a look of sadness on his face. The snow descended on us and his hands grabbed hold of my shoulders unexpectedly, guiding my body close to his. From the look in his eyes, I knew that he was going to kiss me. I could see it as clear as day. I wanted to reach out and hold onto his arms for support, fearing that feeling those lips on mine once again would crush me, but I didn’t. Instead, I stood perfectly still, listening to the sound of my heart beating furiously in my chest. With my arms at my sides, I clenched my hands into fists so hard that my fingernails bit ferociously into my palms, which became damp with droplets of blood. A wave of fear washed over me as he started to lean down, and I didn’t understand why I was so afraid of being this close to him. I had known Brock for years, and been through so much together, why now was I afraid of a kiss? He tilted his head and brought his lips close to mine, and then I realized what this was…it was his way of saying goodbye, just like he had done the night of Lizzie and Thomas’s wedding when we were alone. He kissed me then too, hoping that it would bring some closure, but it didn’t. That kiss only made me feel even more regret, and made my heart ache for him. I was the reason why his spirit still remained on Prox. I couldn’t let him go. I thought I did, I thought I found happiness with Ben, I even told myself that I no longer had feelings for him, but it was all a lie. I had been lying to him and to myself. I trapped his soul here, just as Rhiannon did to Burnley. A voice whispered in my head, telling me to do the right thing. Close your eyes, let him kiss you, it will be all over. Give him what he wants. Set him free. I looked up into his eyes….

“Please Dustin.” He whispered to me.

My fingers moved slightly, and I reached up, clutching a handful of the soft material of his flight jacket in my hand. His beautiful face was so close to mine, and I could feel his breath on my skin. I knew that he wasn’t really here, that this was only his ‘ghost’ but to me, this was Brock. He was alive, living, breathing, existing right in front of me. If I kept holding on, refusing to let go, then I wouldn’t have to admit that he was dead. I can have a little more time with him, just one more day is all I wanted. With his hands holding my body firmly in place, he parted those sweet pale lips, everything in place for the final kiss goodbye, the moment when I would have to accept my own fate and move on.

I closed my eyes, and just as his lips were to touch mine, I turned away. He didn’t say a word, but I could feel him grip me harder, both of my shoulders on fire from the incredible amount of strength he had. As much as I craved his kiss, I didn’t want things to end. Kissing him would mean that I was sending him away. The tension in the air was so thick; you could cut it with a knife. Hearing a movement, I opened my eyes and saw Keith standing there, silent and sullen. I was distracted by the bright red droplets of blood that still remained on his face, and the thick, dark circles under his eyes. The wind picked up at that moment, and I could hear the flapping of Selene’s robes fluttering in the breeze. Off in the distance, barely audible was the unmistakable sound of wings. The crows were returning, and they were eager to see blood spilled again. If I didn’t let Brock take on Selene alone, then we didn’t have any other way into Dawn. She would gleefully kill us without a second thought or remorse. Thomas gave up everything to protect us from her, and now I found myself putting us in danger once again, because I didn’t want to sacrifice anything. He gave up everything, his wife, his children, even his life so that others could live. How could I be so selfish after all that had happened? I looked to Brock. “That’s what it’s all about isn’t it? Putting others before yourself and learning to let go?”

Brock smiled at me, and even through the freezing cold snow, I felt a warmth enter my heart. I waited so long to see that smile again. “Now you finally understand, Dustin. Sometimes choosing the right thing to do is the wrong thing for your heart.”

The moment I saw that smile come across his face, I was filled with a comforting sensation of relief. I leaned forward in his arms and placed my lips over his. “I didn’t think that I could face the dark without you, I kept holding onto you because I was afraid to get lost in it. The things that lurk in the shadows aren’t so scary when you have someone there with you holding onto your hand.…but I see now that someone else needs you more than I do… and someone else needs me too, he’s depending on me and I have to save him. It’s time, Brock. Time for us to become the heroes of the story.” I let go of his arms and dropped my hands down to his waist, pulling his thin body against mine. I took a breath and pressed my lips down, fully accepting his kiss and my own fate. It was both a moment of sadness and joy. Prox had taken so much for each of us, but it also had given us exactly what we needed to move on with our lives, teaching us a very heartbreaking but valuable lesson in the process.

Even though he was nothing more than a spirit, at that moment in time, I felt more close to him that I ever did in life. Even though we had feelings for one another, we both knew that our time together was at an end, and this was the last page of the story for us. It was a bittersweet ending that we knew was eventually coming, but we both refused to acknowledge. Now that it was here, I no longer felt scared of losing him, because part of him would always be with me. I would forever keep the memories in my heart of the time that we spent together and treasure them always, while still letting go and letting him choose his own path in life. I felt him let go of me, but I didn’t pull away, and neither did he. I think that a part of both of us didn’t want that kiss to end. We wanted to savor it, and let it lead us back to a time when things were much simpler, a time before we became corrupted, and lost our innocence. I could almost hear the sound of Brock’s shower, and feel the weight of each and every one of those droplets of water as they cascaded over our naked bodies. We held each other in a tender lover’s embrace, two souls joined together in a moment of passion and pride, each of us knowing that someday we’d eventually have to let go, but refusing to accept it.

We were here now, at the moment, when it was time to say goodbye. I wasn’t sure who broke the kiss off, and it didn’t matter. All I knew is that suddenly his lips were not touching mine, and my heart was breaking. “There are wounds that never appear on the body that hurt more than anything that bleeds.” I said quietly.

“I know, I feel them too.” He whispered back to me. There was a gentleness in his voice that broke my heart and crushed my soul, but at the same time, it felt right. This was our last moment together, two bodies pressed up against one another, in a tight embrace of love and respect, surrounded by snow and silence.

I let go of him and he slipped out of my arms. I could have easily kept him there, just a few minutes more, but it was pointless. He had to go face Selene so that we could have a fighting chance, and I had to let him go. A part of my heart would always yearn for Brock, and I knew that he could say the same thing about me as well, but the truth was that we each had our path to take, and where he was going, I could not follow. The only comfort I took from the whole situation was that Burnley would be waiting for him, and maybe together he could find what he was looking for.

Brock turned away from me, holding onto Burnley’s sword tightly. I had witnessed Ben break the weapon in two in a moment of furious violence that shook me to the very core. The sword was a symbol of pride for his son and destroying it right in front of him wounded him deeper than any physical blow ever could. It crushed his pride. I never thought that I would see it again, but yet here it was, wielded by the only person who could ever find the strength and courage to love that broken man. It was at that moment that I realized that Brock was really in love with Burnley, and there was nothing I could do about it. I took a step forward, my hand reaching out for his, and then immediately withdrew. Sensing me moving behind him, Brock turned and looked over his shoulder. “Dustin, when I engage her, you and Keith have to get moving. I’ll draw her away from the gates and you should be able to get right through, they aren’t locked. Benjamin doesn’t need chains or bars for protection when he has Death itself standing at his door.” As he was speaking, all I could concentrate on was the fact that this was the final goodbye between the two of us; I’d never see him again after this. I hated myself now more than ever, because I was starting to see how foolish I had been all along, taking those who loved me for granted time and time again. The winds caught the edges of his jacket and blew it tightly around this body. I had forgotten how thin he was, and all I wanted to do was pull him into my arms and shelter him from this storm. 

“I am sorry, Brock.” I mumbled. “I thought I was stronger, but I just discovered that having to say goodbye to you is by far the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do.”

Brock smiled at me once again, and I nearly died. “You don’t have to say it, Dustin, just feel it.”

I reached forward and grabbed him, pulling him close to me and wrapped my arms around him. I closed my eyes; it was the only way that I could hold back the tears that there threatening to drown me. He slid his arms around me and leaned into the embrace, one last final time. I wanted to go home, back to a world where we were all just musicians, planning our next tour where the worst thing that could possibly happen was that we got bad takeout food. That world no longer existed, and there was no way we could ever go back. Everything that I once loved, I was losing, a cruel punishment for my own selfishness. Keith moved to join me, giving me a quick pat on the shoulder, and pulling me out of my thoughts. Slowly, I released Brock and noticed that his eyes were wet with tears. 

“You will catch up with us then, right Brock?” Keith asked.

Silence.

We all knew the answer to his question. It would take everything that he had to fight against Selene, there wasn’t any coming back this time. 

“I’ll find you.” Brock said quietly. The wind had picked up now and it was hard to hear him speak. The snow was falling heavier now and we were in almost blizzard like conditions. “No matter what happens, I will come find you.” He looked directly at me, and I knew he was lying. 

Leaving my side, Keith moved over to stand in front of Brock. Reaching into his pocket, he pulled something out. All I could see was a glint of silver. “Take this. It’s my last one, and if you get lost in there….you know... when you come find us and all… you might get hungry. You will need it more than me.” Moving his hand away, I could now see that the metallic color was actually the thin foil wrapper of a pop tart.

“You should hold onto that. You never know when you might need it.” Brock said with an amused grin and started to walk away, leaving Keith staring down dully at the toaster pastry in his hand.

Seeing Brock move forward, Selene brought her scythe forward and it instantly flared to life with a bright purple flash. Energy started to flow through it and crackle loudly in the air. The wind and snow whipped angrily around us as we joined Brock on either side. Off in the distance, I could hear the flapping of menacing wings. They called to me and sang a song of darkness and despair that felt strangely welcome. Something inside of me told me that these were not the wings of the black carrion birds this time, but something much more sinister and ominous. There was a hint of something familiar in the air, but I couldn’t quite place it. It was sweet and floral, and yet underneath it was the lingering scent of decay, that reminded me of dying flowers. Thomas said something about roses. What was it? I couldn’t remember. It made me incredibly uneasy.

Brock raised his sword and looked to me, and I nodded back to him. There was no turning back now. I felt a part of my heart being ripped to shreds, torn and sliced into pieces as thin as paper. Selene left her perch and slowly starting walking down the path towards us, her robes dragging in the new fallen snow. Brock’s eyes flashed with anticipation. He took a deep breath. “Dustin?”

I watched the dark shape of Death come for him, accepting his challenge. “Yes Brock?” I whispered, never taking my eyes off her.

“Save this selfish world.” With those last words, Brock sprinted forward, raising his sword. For a moment the clouds parted and a beautiful beam of moonlight broke through, illuminating him in a soft white brilliance. Selene raised her scythe and whirled it around, letting it sing as it sliced through the air and came crashing down upon Brock’s weapon. There was a blinding flash of light and I heard him scream loudly, breaking the peaceful silence with a bloodcurdling cry.

Keith grabbed my arm and pulled me with great force towards the enormous black gates. “Dustin, RUN!” he shouted, his voice strained and cracking as he tried to make himself heard above the howling winds. I wanted to stay and keep an eye on Brock, I had to know what was going to happen to him, but I remembered the promise that I made to Thomas, to save Prox, and save Ben. I wasn’t going to let them down. All I could do now was run, run as fast as I could and sprint up those steps to make it to Dawn. Trying my best to ignore the sound of the steel weapons crashing against one another, I ran as fast as I could, my lungs threatening to explode from the force. I soon found myself at the gates, with Keith at my side. I started to turn around slightly to look behind me, and I saw him shake his head. “Don’t do it.” He knew that I wanted to turn around and see what was going on, but I knew that I couldn’t stop, I had to keep going. I wrapped my hands around the iron bars and started to push, they moved slightly, creaking open a few inches. That’s when I heard the sound of wings descending on us.


End file.
